Have you ever heard someone use the term “trigger” when speaking of their emotional or psychological health?
It’s become a popular word for people to define pain points in their life.
Triggers make you feel things in extremely powerful ways.
Trigger, simply defined, means this: to cause (an event or situation) to happen or exist.
When speaking to emotional health, in essence, triggers can expose hidden pain or problems that live within your heart and bring them to the surface- in a fast and furious way.
For instance, an insult from a co-worker may normally roll right off your shoulders, but one particular phrase they spoke to you has you spiraling into self-doubt and shame.
Why?
There was a trigger (co-worker insulting you) that resulted in your emotional pain.
Triggers are real and the term helps us to name what happens to us when we are flooded with feelings and emotions that often feel uncontrollable and confusing.
They help us to see, but only if we have eyes to see.
I have often witnessed the secular world teach about triggers, people such as therapists, psychologists, & new age gurus. They present intricate & deep discussions around the topic (hence why people are drawn to them).
Some of these teachers will teach you how to identify triggers, but fail to teach you what to do with them.
This teaching is creating a culture of people that believe by identifying what their feelings mean, they are gaining personal wisdom and power that can transform the spirit and soul.
You feel a sense of empowerment when you understand why you do what you do.
You feel a sense of pride in discovering what seems to be hidden wisdom.
You feel accomplished in discovering “hidden” pieces of yourself.
But now that you are enlightened to the fact that you are angry, sad, frustrated, jealous, anxious, unconsciously believing lies, traumatically affected by past pain… What do you do with that?
This half-haphazard teaching leaves people in an abyss of heightened emotions and understanding, with no answers as to how to properly pinpoint their pain to their deepest need- which is ultimately the need for a Savior.
Instead of looking to Jesus to be that Savior, they become their own.
This leads to dead-ends and disillusionment.
It also leaves people with a false sense of power and healing while the fruit remains the same: a slightly more “aware” person who is still under the curse of sin, sickness, and death.
You cannot be the source of the problem while also being the answer to it.
This worldly wisdom as it pertains to triggers is a trick and a trap to deceive people into believing they have garnered healing for life’s deepest questions and pain.
The other major issue that surfaces within this area of simply identifying triggers is that people begin to dangerously justify bad behavior, all in the name of self-awareness.
“I am triggered! That’s why I acted the way I did.. You don’t understand my trauma responses!”
Justification for treating others badly, due to emotional triggers, is simply self-justification that roots itself in self-preservation.
There is a difference between expecting those who are close to you in life to respond with compassion when you experience pain versus using your pain as a reason to behave unjustly towards others.
The flesh (i.e. your selfish human nature) will justify bad behavior as much as possible to avoid confrontation of the disease within.
This is where earthly wisdom falls short when merely identifying triggers.
But while there are some worldly teachers only scratching the surface surrounding the topic of triggers, there are others who offer a resolution.
This higher level in the hierarchy of secular wisdom does teach you what to do with your triggers.
They have answers to turn that pain into promise.
Promises of peace, love, connection.
Promises of healing.
Promises of hope.
Promises of restoration.
Our world is so drawn to these teachings, ideas, and answers surrounding triggers and emotional health, because the world is desperately hungry and thirsty to be healed, whole, and free.
People want to understand themselves.
People want to know why they do what they do.
People want to find healing for their pain and become a better steward of their emotions.
People also want to find these answers anywhere they can outside of God.
First, because we all naturally avoid God.
That is the nature of the flesh.
We think we can get our answers by doing it all ourselves.
We hate dependence on anyone but ourselves.
We can do it and we don’t need God.
God calls this pride.
Secondly, many people look for these answers outside of God because they have experienced what is often called church hurt.
Many people have experienced very real and true “church hurt” and therefore it feels oxymoronic to find healing, hope, and power in a place that has made them feel weak, confused, and powerless.
God has compassion on that.
He understands.
He sees, he knows.
In fact, his anger is against these churches who preach the power of Christ and have hidden sin, restrictive measures of letting people in, and lead from a place of false humility and hidden motive.
It is evident all throughout scripture that the Lord is extremely concerned with the conduct of his people (and those who claim to be his people) and the resulting influence that has on the world.
If church hurt is part of your story, you must know this-
Jesus still calls to you, because he is the one you must face- not a room full of people who have let their flaws and sin take root and manifest all over the place.
Jesus is who must capture your attention, not the church who got it wrong.
The true church is extremely beautiful (albeit: not perfect!), and when you get rooted in a church that lives out the true Kingdom way, you will find a fresh breath of air you did not realize you needed.
The church is not the enemy, but it has been a stumbling block for many.
This is partly because emotional health and self-awareness that lead people into repentance and sanctification has gone amiss in disciples of Christ.
Consequently, sin takes root, and they become cold to the refining fire of sanctification.
When this happens, Satan comes in with a wrecking ball, creating mass chaos with sin left unattended to.
Satan loves to throw stones at the Body of Christ and works overtime to get everyone he can involved in doing so.
It’s imperative that you do not get distracted by this.
Rather, start first and foremost with Jesus.
Bring your heart and meet his.
His grace, love, and mercy is much stronger than the sin rooted in fleshly hearts and he is the one who makes a way for you to follow him, not them.
But because of our incessant rebellion and wounding from spiritual pain, we convince ourselves we can find understanding and healing all on our own.
And in the wake of that rebellion, the enemy crafts a masterful plan to keep you from receiving the only true source of enlightenment and transformation you crave.
You see, the devil knows that the craving to understand yourself and the quest to become the best version of yourself never goes away.
It has been eternally planted within you, because your spirit longs to be made whole by coming into union with your maker.
There is a true longing to know and embody the wisdom of all mystery and knowledge of the human heart that God alone holds, and the only way to access it is through accepting Jesus as the Lord, or master, of your life.
Some of us suppress this desire by staying busy, ignoring emotions, and living a life that does not hold the depth or purpose it was designed to.
But many of us keep searching.
And the devil is banking on the search.
Which brings us back to the secular teachers who give us answers that will never fully satisfy.
What are these answers they give for healing pain or trauma from triggers?
Nervous system regulation.
Breathing techniques.
Exercise programs.
“De-programming” the brain from previous information through learning and understanding information (logic).
Psychedelic drug trips that promise liberation and understanding.
Visiting energy healers (reiki).
Removing people from your life or creating boundaries.
Therapy.
Journaling.
Some of these are natural, healthy responses that we can practice to take care of our mind & bodies.
Others are rooted in dangerous occultic practices that ensnare your spirit to come into agreement with dark arts.
But none of these can transform your heart like the creator of it can.
Firstly, because no one knows your heart better than the Holy Spirit, including you.
Psalm 19 says it this way, “Who can discern their own errors?”
He sees what we cannot see.
He knows what we do not know.
And you can trust him, because he is the revealer of all truth.
But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth.
John 16:13
I am acquainted with my heart, simply because I am acquainted with him.
Looking through the lens of the self to solve the problem of the self will never work because the lens has a distorted view. It only sees what it wants to see.
The tactic to lead you away from God’s truth is to tell you it’s not actually you that’s the problem… It’s just the programming, the trauma, and the world we live in that’s the problem.
Hence, why so many of us who live in rebellion rail against Christianity- because the core essence of following Jesus is the admittance that our problem lives within us, not just around us.
Yet, it is quite obvious that we are harmful creatures in our flesh.
We destroy good things, we pile self-loathing onto ourselves, and most of our motives are self-seeking and prideful.
Once you see it, you cannot unsee it.
This is why coming up against your lack is the best thing that can ever happen to you.
Blessed are the poor in spirit, says Jesus, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
A few months back I had a friend call me who has been wrestling with following Jesus for quite some time.
His entire life has been dedicated to creating a life that produces the best outcome he can think of, which mostly consists of money and the idyllic “american dream” sort of existence.
Constantly striving, constantly anxious, and constantly passionate in the midst of it.
This guy is one of my greatest friends and his resilience to live a passionate life is inspiring.
His moral code kept to a strict do good and you are good, do bad and you are bad mentality.
His idea of justice and righteousness were built on the faulty foundation that our actions eternally justify us as good people or bad people.
This was his theology, for better or worse.
Because this was his worldview, he was bent on creating a life of good choices and positive actions that would reflect the good character he desired to possess; especially since his younger years were consumed with bad behavior he did not want to return to.
One day, he called me in an anxious frenzy about life.
As I turn on mentorship mode in my brain, I start to ask clarifying questions to understand what’s happening in his heart that is creating these “trigger” like responses he’s experiencing.
Suddenly, it surfaces- what was once under the water has now bobbed up to be exposed.
He had an altercation with someone and went into a ballistic rage against them, threatening their life.
He was completely shocked by his own behavior, so much so, that he was being tormented by the reality of how he could have ever reacted in such a way.
He recognizes the utter evil within it, he tells me, but proceeds to relay his sense of justification in it: He was triggered, because it was a life or death situation and his wife was involved.
His rationale (read: flesh) begins to convince him that although it was definitely wrong, this was simply a primal response that he had no control over, and he is therefore justified in it.
But even with this rationale that he begins to develop as a sense of grace when he is face to face with the worst of himself, he cannot shake the utter despondency and disappointment he is experiencing.
This is a moment of true conviction, and the pathway diverges into either the broad or narrow way.
In this moment, he had to decide whether he would follow his “rationale” or flesh, and sweep this under the rug as simply a human mistake, or take the narrow way and recognize this as a humbling moment that leads him to his need for Jesus.
What seemed to trouble him most was the lack of control he felt when this happened. It was as if he had no control whatsoever when he became triggered.
The beautiful gospel grace that I was able to share with this dear friend is that he did not have any control, because he has no power over the sinful desires of his flesh to rage, kill, murder.
Enter: The beauty of the gospel.
Jesus became our victory so that we no longer have to stay enslaved to that which enslaves us.
No matter how hard my friend wanted to be a good person, he still fell short, and his flesh still won.
And maybe you haven’t wanted to kill someone, but you have certainly dealt with your own personal iniquity due to the control of your flesh.
For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23
But JESUS!
His victory is our victory.
He defeated sin, death, and the grave so that we may also die to our flesh, and live in the victorious power his blood bought for us.
He makes all things new.
This was the day my friend became acquainted with the depravity of his flesh, and consequently, became acquainted with the glorious freedom bought for him on the cross.
His passion has now come full circle, and his sanctification ensues.
The flesh wants what is contrary to the spirit, and the spirit what is contrary to the flesh.
And if the flesh leads to death, and the spirit to life, then when we view our inner world with the lens of death, we will surely die.
Let me note this:
There can be a pending belief in the secular world that Christians throw the baby out with the bathwater when it comes to emotional health & practical health disciplines.
Breathing, stretching, therapy (with spirit-led, discerning people), journaling, processing emotions, etc. are extremely beneficial tools in my life.
I use these often to remain a healthy and balanced person, connect with my own heart to process with God, and to edify the body I have been given.
But these are all merely tools that are intended to lead me back to the master builder.
I can have this bag of tools I carry around with me all day long, but if I am not acquainted with the design of what I am working on, then these tools are useless.
Let’s use a hammer as an example.
I can walk around hammering nails in every wall I see.
Similarly, I can use my breathing practice anytime that I come up against fear.
But if I am not hammering a house built on the rock, that will sustain me into eternity, what is all my hammering doing for me?
Likewise, if I am using breathing techniques to stay calm every day of my life, but I don’t have access to the peace that passes all understanding and leads me into an eternity of peace- then what does the technique, or tool, really do for me?
These practices are simply additions; supplementals that are supposed to lead us back to the source that fulfills all our needs.
These tools are only truly powerful and efficient when the master builder teaches us how to use them for his purposes.
This brings us back to triggers.
Crafty cultural wisdom will tell you that tending to triggers is about personal growth.
That is true, and yet it is limited in its understanding, for personal growth in itself is not an end to a means.
For the believer, personal growth is meant to lead you onward and upward, towards the high call of becoming like Christ.
And that growth is all-encompassing, which means it is so much more than personal.
Our high calling is not for us alone, although we are involved in every way.
Our high calling is a road less traveled, called the narrow way.
The footprints laid out on this road can only be tracked and traversed through what we call sanctification- or in layman's terms, becoming like Jesus.
He is our high priest.
He is the author and finisher of our faith.
He is our model, our beloved, our most worthy image of what it means to become holy and pure.
His ways are so much higher than our ways.
We want to be like him in every way.
Oh, but this is not an easy way.
It is sacrificing every single day.
Our need to be right, our desire to be selfish, our urge to be the best in every way.
It’s laying down what we thought we wanted, when he tells us there is a better way.
It is choosing to partner with trust, when our mind tells us that we must partner with fear.
It is recognizing our weakness, our inability, to do or create anything of lasting importance without his spirit eternally in us.
It is the recognition that we need him, desperately, every day.
Such a contrary gospel to the one preached today, drawing people in by assuring them THEY possess the way.
They are the savior, they are the source, they are the one with the power to make wrongs right and rectify their selfish, hateful hearts.
But again, you cannot be the source of the problem and the answer as well.
So what do we do when triggers ensue?
We tune in and turn up.
We zoom in with a magnifying glass instead of running away.
We partner with the spirit to find what it is that peturbs us or disturbs us.
What is it that hurts me so?
What is it that makes me go berserk?
Why does it feel like my world is caving in?
Don’t run away, for this is holy ground.
This is where the process of sanctification begins, but only if you allow.
Fresh wind blew over me again and again this month as I remember what I have learned in seasons past- blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
There is a raw awareness of pain that surfaces when we die to our flesh and yield ourselves to the holy work of sanctification.
But what else can so poignantly bring me back to the deep need I possess for my Savior and the salve of his truth, if not my deepest pain and suffering?
What a gift!
For you see, suffering is the key.
When I experience the jeering pain of sin, I am then invited into deeper levels of his glory. I am met with his love, comfort, and glory.
This pain makes me run to the Father and cry out to him with all that is within me.
It brings me back to the feet of Jesus.
It makes me so desperately hungry and thirsty for his truth, his comfort, his love.
I won’t make it without him! I will be overcome by iniquity and it’s gripping tentacles that want to consume me.
It makes me so indelibly grateful that I have him!
It makes me so grateful that he has ME!
The truth begins to ring in my ears- he would never leave me or forsake me!
When the world is against me, when no one understands my heart, and even when I despise my own self… There he stands, inviting me into the crevices of his heart, so that I may curl up in a nook I have never explored with him before. And as I remain in that hidden place with him, I become transformed to be like him.
For you see, when I am residing inside this special place of his heart, I become familiar with the beating of it.
I memorize the rhythms and they integrate into me.
I study the inner chambers of his being and it illuminates me.
I am so close to the sound of it beating, I can not hear the voices that would slander me, or the lack that cries out from within me.
All I can hear is his glory.
His heart is his glory.
The way into this nook of his heart that is so deep, the way so narrow and steep, is to enter into the pain given to me.
It was given as an opportunity to become more like him, and I will not squander any opportunity to be formed in his likeness.
Formed in his likeness, is to be formed in the truth.
Did you know that Jesus said he is the way, the truth, and the life?
In this passage from John 14, Jesus is speaking to his disciples about preparing the way for them to enter into eternal life with him.
As he is describing eternal life and the invitation for them to one day join him there, Jesus says to them “Where I go you know, and the way you know.”
The disciples began to get upset, exclaiming that they do not know the way to get to where Jesus is going.
“Lord, we do not know where you are going, and how can we know the way?”
The disciples in this moment feel like a picture of the people of the world; those who are constantly asking, seeking, knocking on the doors of the mental health department, the new age guru, and the instagram psychologists.
Jesus is right in front of them, saying that wherever he is, that is where truth resides, because he is the truth.
And yet, they are still asking, “what is the way?”
Jesus says, “It is me! I AM THE WAY.”
As John 14 continues, we get to some of my favorite scripture in the Bible: Jesus promising the gift of the Holy Spirit.
This is how he describes the Holy Spirit in reference to following The Way:
“If you love me, obey my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads you into all truth.”
What Jesus says next is extremely telling of why the world is running after answers from everyone but the spirit of truth..
“The world cannot receive him, because he isn’t looking for him, and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you.”
We must be looking for the truth to receive it.
The only way to look for that truth, is to look through the lens of Jesus, who is the truth.
You must know him, to know the truth.
When Jesus said he is the way, truth, and life he did not simply say his commandments were true or that they lead to life, although that is true, but he was making it clear that he (personally, himself) is the truth and life.
Jesus is truth, embodied.
Which means when we come to him, we come to the truth in its fullness; and when we abide in him, we abide in truth.
It is the truth that has become such a salve to my soul these days.
I can trust him to reveal all truth to me, at all times.
There is no one else who will be able to represent the full truth, without bias, to me.
This is why holiness is such a profound, praise-worthy attribute of the Lord, and magnified in all of scripture.
To be holy is to be pure.
Pure means no mixture and no dilution- nothing but the purest form.
Therefore, when God says he is the God of justice and truth, I can trust that he is the purest, most sincere form of these things, because he is holy.
He is the great “I AM” which means he is everything.
It is a divine mystery that cannot be fully grasped in the mind, yet the spirit of God knows and bears witness to within us.
He is all in all, and he is complete in his holiness.
When I am triggered, I can come to him and he shows me the deeper layers that were previously unknown to me.
When someone accuses me of pride or insolence, I can sit with the Lord and allow him to weigh my motives and tell me the truth about my behavior.
When the world tells me how I should think, I can stand on the bedrock foundation of scriptural truth so I will not be swayed into ideas I may not initially see as harmful, but end in death.
I can always trust him to tell me the truth.
And not only will he reveal the truth, he will help me to walk in it.
“You will lead me and guide me in all truth.” John 16:13
I have had some extremely beautiful moments with the Lord as he has revealed the truth to me, and then taught me to walk in his way that leads to life.
I have often struggled with compassion for myself when I get triggered.
I used to believe the lie that when I did something bad, I was bad.
This is an identity issue.
But I never knew it was an identity issue, until God revealed this to me.
I simply thought that this was a normal response of regret, and I believed shame is what would make me ‘do better’ next time.
But shame is not from the Lord, and it never works as a motivator.
Conviction is holy, shame is not.
Shame comes from the devil, and the cunning lie we often believe is that it will help us to change if we stay in our shame.
Only love can truly transform our hearts, and love delights in truth.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 1 Corinthians 13:6
I want to leave you with a story out of the many I hold in the treasure chest of beauty God has given me in our intimacy, to display what I mean by God showing us truth, and then leading us in it.
As you grow in maturity in the Lord, you will find season by season that your struggles shift.
Meaning, what once felt like a fight to overcome, now feels like a small pebble in your shoe.
In my early days of salvation, I sinned against the Lord in a way that used my body.
This act of sin held me in such bondage to shame most of my life.
Before salvation, it made me feel like a terrible person who God hated.
After salvation, I just felt massive sorrow.
I immediately felt the disconnect within me.
It was as if I could literally feel the ripping apart that my sin had created between me and the one whom my soul loved.
My sin created distance between me and God, and that was the first time in my life I was able to understand what it really meant to grieve the Spirit.
I was overcome with grief and remorse.
For two days I cried.
I asked the Lord for forgiveness, and he forgave me immediately, as he always does and always will.
Yet, I couldn’t get over my grief. I didn’t know how to let it go.
So I sat with the Lord, and just cried.
Suddenly, I was overcome with the peace of his presence and I saw a vision of Jesus, dancing on a grave. He was full of joy and laughter!
And he said to me, “I dance on your iniquity.”
It was his delight to pay for my sin, so I never have to stay in sorrow or stay distant from him at all.
He paid the price and filled in the gap between us.
He did not desire the punishment my sorrow was demanding of me.
Correction, yes.
Punishment, no.
He gave me his perspective of forgiveness, and it brought me so much joy.
In that season, God was really helping me to have compassion on myself.
He constantly invites me to see myself from his eyes, and when I do that, I find fields of grace to frolic in.
My attention turns from my lack, to his abundance.
I stop focusing on what I did wrong, and instead focus on the glory of his sacrifice for me to be made right.
He is The Life, and from him all life will flow.
In sum, a trigger can be a beautiful opportunity, an invitation, to become more intimate with the creator of your soul.
Triggers are truly part of sanctification when we follow Jesus.
Outside of that, they are merely recurring patterns of our flesh that keep us in bondage and shame.
Turn to Jesus with your triggers, and watch him turn them into blessings.